Sleeping for one... looking like five

Jimmy's in Texas for four whole days. Probably golfing, but pretending to be at a medical conference. That's the life. Except for golfing it lame, and Texas doesn't have any snow (not that we do either), and you have to sit in classes all day...

That means I get the bed all to my self. I sleep on about 6 inches of the bed. I know you are thinking that's not possible because I am at least 50 inches wide, but I am telling you the truth. I sleep on the very edge of the bed and I rarely move. So, why do I like the bed to myself? I have no idea. But, every time Jimmy leaves town, the first thing I think is --- yeah me, I get to sleep in my big fat bed all by myself.

This leads me to questions. I have worked hard so that all of my kids have their own space. Devon has a bedroom bigger than most master bedrooms, he has 6 or 7 cages with various creepys in them. He has two closets and a bigger king size bed than I do. The rest of the kids aren't far behind. So... the question is this--- why do I have to share my room and my bed? I'm the parent. I should have the biggest space of all, with all my stuff and my big bed. Why do I have to share a bed? Why do I have to share my bathroom? Why do I have to share my closet? ( I actually don't, but I have before.) Am I wrong in my thinking?

Don't get me wrong. I like Jimmy sometimes, but my bed just feels so much more free when I'm in it alone. What's a pretty girl to do? (I am the pretty girl by the way) Maybe I should look for a few sister wives. They can share their beds. I could be the oprah watching wife. You know, I could have a babysitting wife, a cooking wife, a cleaning wife and I could be the oprah watching, fun shopping (no grocery shopping), sleep in my own bed wife. At the end of the day I could catch all the wives up on the T.V. and the great sales at the local outlet mall and then I could go to my own room, with my own stuff, that no one else touches and I could go to sleep.

I feel like this is a strong plan. The problem with sister wives is the hair and the dresses though. Does any one have any ideas that will solve all my huge problems? Maybe I could say I had chemo and my hair was the only wig that they make? Or that allergies made me not be able to wear creepy dresses... although if you've seen my great nightgown it may nix that one. Hmmmm... These are some real questions I'm going to need to sleep on before I head to Colorado City.